Time Will Never Erase

Countless nights, countless tears
Countless days thinking of you. No matter what we do in life from this point on, it will never erase the pain. He was a person that very few really got to know because of all the ailments that he went through in his twenty seven months but the few of us that were lucky to spend time with him know that he was and is an outstanding person. It's tough when you lose a prized possession but he is not lost, he is simply some where waiting for us to come and see him again. AA we will see you soon. Love you.
Mama, Papa and Beemer

Send It To Us

What's Your Address Again?

Hello Everyone...Hope every one is doing well. We are doing the best we can given the situation and are doing our best to take everyday as it comes our way. We are looking back at the wonderful turnout of over 200 people that came to pay their respects to the Warrior at his wake and funeral. As we review the guest book for the funeral home we realized that there was not enough space in the guest book for every one to sign. As a result we are asking everyone that attended the wake, memorial mass & burial ceremony to please send us your mailing address via e-mail in order for us to send out thank you notes. We are very proud of the impact that AA made on so many and we want to show our appreciation. Please e-mail your information in the following format.

First & Last Name
Full Mailing Address


Thank you & God Bless you all.
Roi & Michelle

r.legar@gmail.com

Where Angels Are

This Real Cosmic Entity Looks Like An Angel, Our Angel Warrior.

Today was a day in which Michelle and I found ourselves enjoying so many of the wonderful things AA would do when he was here with us. Everything from facial expressions, phrases he picked up from us, the way he would imitate birds or planes and even the way he walked, as we took a walk together. Our Angel has done such a wonderful job in making us happy. He amazes me more and more each day with the undeniable imprint he has left on our souls. I thank him very much for taking care of us now. Every time we find ourselves crying, he finds a way to make us smile through his loving and silly ways.
Roi

Thank You Inspiration Through Art

Please view the nice effect that Inspiration Through Art placed on one of the pics I took of AA when we took him to The Bronx Zoo. They placed this pic on their page today to remember AA's 2 weeks of passing to Heaven.
Roi

Cosmic Triangle

Not everyone has the fortune of finding love and friendship all in one person. Let alone in two people, the blessing is even more rare. I have to consider my self extremely fortunate and blessed to have an awesome woman as a friend and wife but also equally blessed to have a wonderful boy and young man as a friend and son, in AA. Our pride is a continuous flow of love that is still flowing from our hearts. On another note, for the last two nights,I was able to witness a cool sighting in the sky at night. I have seen the crescent moon form a triangle with two very bright stars. What makes me like this picture is the fact that it reminds me of AA and how he is with us and will always be with us no matter what time of day it may be. I love you AA and always miss you Gordo. I look forward to seeing you soon my boy. Love always,
Your Papa.

2 Weeks Ago

Missing Our AA!

Today, Monday marks two weeks in which our beloved Andrew Aidan passed onto his new life in Heaven. Everyday has been hard as we find ourselves still struggling to deal with this situation. The days do not seem to get better and time does not seem to heal either. We cry, we cry often as we remember his warmth, his smile, his great smile, laughter or the way he would sleep or touch our faces gently. There are so many things we admire about him. We find ourselves missing him so much and remembering so many of the wonderful things that AA gave to us on a daily basis and how he still gives us love today as we relive those wonderful memories of him. We still feel him around us and at times feel like he has given us certain signs that he still is with us.
Good night.
Roi

I Am Always With You

I wanted to share with you the the poem I read for AA's wake. Hope everyone had a a good day.
Roi

I Am Always With You

When I am gone, release me, let me go.

I have so many things to see and do,

You mustn't tie yourself to me with too many tears,

But be thankful we had so many good years.

I gave you my love, and you can only guess

How much you've given me in happiness.

I thank you for the love that you have shown,

But now it is time I traveled on alone.

So grieve for me a while, if grieve you must

Then let your grief be comforted by trust

That it is only for a while that we must part,

So treasure the memories within your heart.

I won't be far away for life goes on.

And if you need me, call and I will come.

Though you can't see or touch me, I will be near

And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear

All my love around you soft and clear

And then, when you come this way alone,

I'll greet you with a smile and a "Welcome Home".

My Little Butterfly

Hi everyone...Hope all is well. I just wanted to share with you the poem that I read at AA's Memorial Mass. Hopefully it will touch you the way it touched us. 

Roi

My Little Butterfly

© Barbara Ann Rogers

Today a little butterfly flew by me.

I thought to myself where have you been little butterfly.

You come into this world as a cocoon all by yourself and blossom into

this beautiful butterfly and fly off to see the world.

What you don’t realize little butterfly as you flutter through your days

is how you touch those around you in your soft gentle way.

You don’t even realize the wonder and awe you create around you.

she fluttered her wings toward me as if she was waving good-by as she

headed towards the horizon.

She looked very happy and content as she went on her way, as if to say

to me “Don’t worry I’ll be okay”.

I was sad to see her go for she had touched my heart in such a way that

I knew my life would never be the same.She had left an imprint of all the beauty life has to offer.

I knew each time I looked at another butterfly or horizon I would

remember our moment in time when it was only her and I.

I knew I would be a better person all because this little butterfly flew by

me one bright sunny day.

Source: My Little Butterfly, Funeral Poem for Friends http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/my-little-butterfly#ixzz1npkcnYvB 

A Poem For AA

Hi everyone,
Please view a poem written for Andrew Aidan. It was written by Brandon McClaskey one of the nicest people we have met. Brandon was present at AA's first wake session and asked if he could read this and we let him read it. Please enjoy.

Heavens trumpets sounded, and you answered Andrew. I know in your ascent you were wrapped in a blanket made of unwavering peace and the everlasting love of Mommy and Daddy. Taken too soon and yet you taught us all lessons that will last many lifetimes, and so Andrew, as are your lessons, you too are eternal. The brightest light in all of our hearts that will never extinguish. And so exist now in Gods light, no shadow cast upon you, you are freed from Earthly slumber, free now to truly live. Thank you Andrew for introducing me to your family, so beautiful, so caring. No more hunger Andrew, no more ambre, no more am. Sit back and enjoy Baby Andrew, tu familia will be there in what will seem like an instant, and forever will you be together again, in peace. Don't worry Andrew for we are not sad, but we certainly have sadness in us. Rest well my love, and thank you.

Son of Honor

The days are long these days. Before we started this journey with AA the days flew by. Trying to make the most of each day. Our days were focused on taking care of the house, taking care of AA, going to work, going shopping and all of the other things that come along with the package of being a married couple with children. Now those days are gone. We focus now on trying to get out of the house in order to not cry or sleep all day because of the pain and disbelief of not having AA with us anymore in the physical sense. Now we have no structure to our day like we did once. We hardly know what to do with each other given that so much of our time was spent on AA. Sometimes we forget to eat, or sometimes I find myself waking up late and freaking out because I feel that I have forgotten AA in the crib. How this will make sense I have no idea. We understand he is with us in the spiritual sense but it still hurts that he is not with us in the physical sense. You get used to people quickly, especially to those you love. We miss his smile, his laugh, his breath, his words, his sweetness and his unconditional love for us. I cry everyday for our boy. Just because I appear to be strong doesn't mean that mean that I am. I feel so weak without my inspiration which was and is my boy.
Before AA went to Heaven I came up with the idea of presenting him with the Purple Heart. The Pure Heart is a medal awarded by the US military to those soldiers that have been wounded or killed in combat. I feel that our Warrior earned that same Honor for he fought with extreme valour against cancer and won the war through passing on to the next phase of life. Luckily, he was able to wake up before he passed and I was able to explain what the medal means and he was able to touch it, feel it and see it while also hearing me speak and sharing it with him. I am honored to have given him this presentation and will look for him one day in Heaven as he wears this medal for I am going to get one for Michelle & I as well. Thank God for replica medals and the Internet.
Roi

Moment of Appreciation

Hello everyone,

What an emotion filled last couple of days. Yesterday was the beginning of the healing process for us and the many friends and families that have been devastated by the passing of our Warrior to the next phase of life. Bidding good bye to our wonderful boy has been such an excruciating experience. It has been a tsunami of emotions that has totally flooded the inner crevices of our mind and soul. It has caused a mass exodus of

emotions to empty from our souls during the process.     We are very proud that our boy has had the ability to touch so many people. In fact, the 200 plus people that came to give their respects to AA was truly humbling. It was amazing and we were so touched by the experience. We also want to thank the people that donated the 25+ beautiful floral arrangements as gifts of honor to AA. There were so many people that were truly touched by our experience, struggles, devotion and love for each other. We are very appreciative for the wonderful service we received from Farenga & Sons Funeral Home. The service we received from Gus, Tommy & the rest of the staff was truly outstanding and we recommend them for moments such as this. We also want to thank the many supporters that we have had via text message, e-mail, mail, blog comments and phone calls while also thanking Jack Resnick & Sons, Friends of Karen, Our Lady of Fatima RC Church, including Fr. Jack, Fr. Mahoney & Sister Patricia for the wonderful help they provided us along with & St. Michael's Cemetery. We would also like to thank those that have cooked for us this week and helped us around our home during such a hard experience. On a final note, we really want to say thank you to those friends and family that traveled from California, Florida, Pennsylvania and other places, we truly appreciate the sacrifice you made to be with us. We would also like to let everyone know that we love you all and to please continue to follow the blog as we try to share with you our path to healing. We will also going to keep AA's blog going as we try to be a positive influence for other families that are going through an experience similar to ours or for those that may go through something similar in the future.
Thank you and good night.
Roi & Michelle

No Photos | No Video At Any of AA's Services

Absolutely NO Video taking.

Absolutely NO Photo Taking

I would like to inform every one that there is absolutely no video or photo taking permitted inside the funeral home, during the church service, during the burial. No pictures of the casket, or of the flowers or of AA or of us or of anyone else inside or around the area. This is a closed casket service. I will personally ask you to delete the image or video and will ask you to leave immediately if you can not respect our wishes. I will not make ANY exceptions and will not beat around the bush when it comes to this. If you feel that you cannot respect our wishes, we ask that you do not come. This is the only thing that we ask of you. Thank you for understanding and we look forward to seeing you there and celebrating the wonderful life of AA.
Roi

Eternal

Mama, AA & Dada. The Team That Fought To The End!

The wind blows me closer to you

The sun warms whispers of your voice in my ear.

Every blink floods my cortex of over flow of memories 

That inundate my heart with thoughts of you.

The sweet evening blanket of the moon

caresses our hearts as we hear the dulce timbre of your voice

forever etched in our heart and souls as we hear the meoldic

sound of Mama, Papa in every wonderful song 

of the trees against the starlit evening canvas.

The major and minor scales of Heaven 

greeted your entrance with the eternal passion

of Andalucian saints singing the cante

of Praise and Glory 

As a new warrior joins the ranks 

of the Eternal, the Immortal. 

Of the Beloved

Roi  "Papa" LeGar

Everyday with out Andrew Aidan is a recurring nightmare that does not seem to end.  It is a bad memory that we want to forget but can not. Last night at 3am we were roaming the streets of our neighborhood, full of tears, grief and disbelief, not knowing what to do or how to go on. On every corner, in every park there is a memory. A memory of our baby who we miss truly. Our baby who will now be our Eternal Flame.  Andrew Aidan for us, was and is every thing as many of you already know.
How do you rebuild in the aftermath of a tragedy of epic proportions? Where do you begin? We have no idea of how this happened or how it will turn out. We are happy that, The Warrior has made his way home as he joins his brethren in the ranks of the Holy Army. Those of us that are left in the wake of the Great Destruction of our souls have to come together, join forces, regroup and move ahead. With firm remembrance of the one we call, The Warrior as we venture to rebuild ourselves. With his careful watch we will heal and continue to glorify the name of His Commander as he fills us with the peace of Heaven. It has been so magical to have the amazing support of our family, friends and Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center staff but also of the innumerable amount of strangers who are now friends of ours and of AA from around God's green Earth. It has been through this collective of wonderful souls that we have been able to continue onward. All because that is how AA would have wanted it. AA was the consummate fighter who did not complain once while he was in the middle of a brutal war. He always held his head up high, stayed focused and showed a Godly amount of strength that we had no choice but to emulate. People say we have been strong through this, but our strength came from seeing The Warrior. Our strength came from a belief in love, a love so great that it could defeat everything, even death. AA did not lose his battle, he won it. You see the cancer that was in his body has been destroyed through Andrew Aidan's ascension into Heaven. The Warrior won this battle and we are happy and proud of his victory with the Lord leading the way. Let us celebrate his beauty, his life, his amazing ability to unite every one behind one single cause, towards one purpose. Let us be happy for him for now we all have an ally in God's Holy Army.
Roi

AA's Wake, Mass & Burial Information

Our Angel Warrior, AA

Hello everyone,
We would like to invite you all to share with us the living memory of our Angel Warrior, Andrew Aidan LeGar. Our 27 month old boy did not lose his battle with cancer but defeated the cancer that invaded his body by ascending to the next phase of life, which is much richer and peaceful. It is a place we can all reach one day if we make the right decisions.
Although, he is not with us in the flesh, he will be with us in spirit as well celebrate the joyous memory of his life together for his wake, memorial mass & burial.
Please find the information for each service below.

AA's Wake & Viewing -1 Day Viewing
Date: Wednesday, March 14th, 2012
Times: 2-5pm & 7-9pm

Farenga & Sons Funeral Home, Inc.

38-08 Ditmars Boulevard

Astoria, NY 11105

718-726-6060

http://www.farengafuneralhome.com/

AA's Memorial Mass
Date: Thursday, March 15th, 2012
Time: 11:00am

Our Lady of Fatima Roman Catholic Church
25-02 80th Street  
East Elmhurst, NY 11370
718-899-2801 
http://olfparish.catholicweb.com/ 

AA's Burial
Date: Thursday, March 15th,2012
Time: Procession Following Mass

St. Michael’s Cemetery

72-02 Astoria Boulevard

East Elmhurst, NY 11370

718- 278-3240

http://www.stmichaelscemetery.com/

Thank You & God Bless!
Roi & Michelle

RIP Andrew Aidan LeGar 12/05/2009 - 3/12/2012

Our Angel Is Now With The Lord.

Today, it is with extreme sadness that we have to report that at 4:15pm our Angel Warrior, Andrew Aidan LeGar was escorted to Heaven by his Angel brothers to praise God in eternal glory. He was with Mama & Dada when he ascended to Heaven. We are grateful that we had the pleasure and honor of spending our son's last moments together with him alone. He was very peaceful and fell asleep into Glory. I, personally, was lucky to be the first person to hold him and hold his hand in life and the last to do the same as his Spirit rose to heights that transcend all life. We were sincerely blessed with the love, companionship, friendship, and outstanding joy of having such a wonderful person and soul as a son.

Andrew Aidan, Our Angel Warrior.

We are very proud of the the great courage and valour that AA displayed everyday as he fought. Although we are profoundly sad and will miss our dear boy greatly, we are happy that he is with God and is in the best company possible. He will now have a special place to call home as he awaits our arrival one day. We look forward to having our very own Angel in Heaven as he watches over us and hopefully his future brothers and sisters. We will be posting the wake and funeral information in following posts as well as placing it on the right hand side of the blog with travel directions. Thank you all for your support and love through this very difficult time. We thank God for a wonderful son and know that his memory will live eternally.
Roi & Michelle

Dada, Mama & AA

When he shall die

Take him and cut him out in little stars

And he will make the face of heav'n so fine

That all the world will be in love with night

And pay no worship to the garish sun.

~William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

Hoping For A Miracle

This Says It All!

Blessings to all. Glad to have the wonderful opportunity to write to you today. AA is still fighting like a champ. We had a good and stable day yesterday with the exception of a mediport infiltration. What is a mediport filtration? It is when a needle that goes into his mediport is either not completely in or comes out by mistake and the fluid goes into the body instead of the mediport. Well, this happened to AA yesterday and he had a ball of fluid in his upper right chest. Luckily it was picked up very quick and the bad line was replaced. In order to get the fluid out of the tissue we needed to place heat packs on the site until the fluids were completely absorbed by the body. Besides that we had a good day with a few friends and family members. Actually had a very nice time with Dr. L & my mom speaking about a wide array of topics. That was fun. Thanks again to Dr. L for spending time with us while her family was at home. We truly appreciate the time and sacrifice you have always made with us. Thanks! Daylight savings time really threw us a loop as we had a rough time waking up today from that lost hour of sleep. Today, Sunday was also a nice day, it was very stable in regards to AA's vital stats. He has been having some very good vitals these last couple of days. We are shocked & so are the doctors. We hope that this is God's miracle taking place before our very eyes. It has been great to have him be a bit more responsive and he moved his head and mouth a bit more today while giving us the wonderful surprise of a very faint smile. That was amazing. There was more family that visited today as well. Michelle also had her Professor from Pace University come and visit us Dr. Singleton. It was very nice to have had her visit us. She brought AA a very cute stuffed dog and brought us the same thing as well. She also gave AA a beautiful book called "Up, Up, Up" which she read to him. It was a nice moment.
As we were winding our day down, we were surprised as usual by AA. Michelle noticed that AA started to have an allergic reaction to something because his face, neck, chest & legs got blotchy. By the time the nurse & doctor came in, his allergic reaction was already fading away. It then came back again for about a minute and went away. The doctors are trying to figure out what it could be and will be watching closely. We also wanted to thank Michelle's sister Stephanie & her mother Alicia for holding a fundraiser today at our church. They recruited a large amount of friends and family to help out and they said that it went well. We were happy to hear that, because Stephanie had put in a good amount of work into the project. Thank you to everyone that helped and supported the event. We truly appreciate it and love you all.

Hem your blessings with thankfulness so they don't unravel.  ~Author Unknown

Your Comments Are Always Welcome!

Please share your thoughts with us!

Hi Every One...We just wanted to let you know that your comments are always well received for any of our posts. The amount of support we have received has been amazing. We have received wonderful prayers, letters, meetings and donations that have been truly God sent and we hope that The Lord abundantly blesses you all for helping AA and us continue this battle. We are still fighting and most importantly AA is still fighting. Every time a post is put on the blog, right below it is the option to leave a comment. Please see the pictures below to see instruction on how to post comments and as you post a comment it will be listed on the left hand side of the blog for others to see as well. Thank you for your amazing support and please stay tuned for more updates.
Roi &

Add your comment below each posting by clicking the blue comment word
then writing in the Post A Comment box

When you add your comment it will look like these on the left hand side of the blog.

Another Day...Hope Is Still Alive

Revelation 21:4 He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”

Read more: http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/22-inspirational-bible-verses/#ixzz1okX7R4vt

Today Saturday is a good day because our warrior AA is still fighting. He is sleeping and has been more responsive at certain times. We keep hope alive because anything thing is possible with God by our side. He had a good evening with no fever but has not opened his eyes yet. He had his mediport needles changed today and was given a nice bath by his mama. We gave him some eye drops to help his eyes stay lubricated and did his normal mouth care today. Mama did give him some special medicated mouth wash to make sure no bacteria grows in his mouth. The doctors still can't believe that he is still going the way he is going. He looks very peaceful and comfortable. We hope that God proves them wrong. We are waiting for AA to wake up, jump out of bed and tell all the doctors to take a hike. As much as we love our docs, I think they would like that as well. We had a nice evening with friends and family again. Thankfully, they have helped us in getting our minds distracted a bit. We also wanted to thank the sister of Michelle's friend Melba for cooking for us twice this week. Thank you! We also want to thank the prayer group that came by yesterday. We will keep you updated as things happen. Have a great day!

Roi

AA...The Little Engine That Could

This book was written about kids like Andrew Aidan.

Well, what can I say?....Our big warrior is still fighting tooth and nail to be with us...yesterday evening was a good evening for him. He was very stable and slept all day. We had some more friends and family come over last night, including Michelle's former colleagues from Barclays, Dr. Kalish, Melissa L., Veronica L. & Kerry K. We had a very nice prayer session as well as we continue to hope for a prayer. He gives us more hope as the days go on. Early this morning, he did have a fever of 101.84F. Pretty high for anybody. Michelle jumped into action and got some cold compresses and Tylenol was able to get his fever back under. Thankfully, since then he has been very good. He has been responsive. Michelle tried putting on AA's oxygen mask and he kept turning his head away because he did not want her to put it on. He also was responsive to one of the doctors as well. Father Jack and Sister Patricia from Our Lady of Fatima came by today and said a prayer for us as well. We also had a second group of people come from another church to pray for AA. We hope that God is hearing all the prayers and good thoughts that so many people have for AA and us that makes him change his mind in regards to bringing AA up to heaven at this moment. Until next time.
Roi

New Videos of AA's on You Tube...

www.youtube.com/user/musicforandrew

Hi everyone...Just wanted to let you know that we posted some new videos of AA on YouTube today. Hope you enjoy them as much as we do. Have a good evening.
Roi

The Bravest Kind Of Kid: Thinking Of Andrew Aidan LeGar

The Bravest Kind Of Kid: Thinking Of Andrew Aidan Legar
http://blogs.babble.com/dadding/2012/03/08/the-bravest-kind-of-kid-thinking-of-andrew-aidan-legar/

Hi everyone...Just wanted to share this thoughtful article posted on babble.com by Serge Bielanko who read of AA's Story through NYC Dad's Group. Thanks again guys..
Roi


http://blogs.babble.com/dadding/2012/03/08/the-bravest-kind-of-kid-thinking-of-andrew-aidan-legar/

Lend Andrew Aidan A Helping Hand!

Thank You For Your Help!

As you all well know, in July 2011 we learned that Andrew Aidan was diagnosed with a rare inoperable malignant brain tumor, called Atypical Teratoid Rhabdoid Tumor. AA has endured multiple brain procedures, extensive chemo & radiation therapy and now has multiple tumors on his spine. The doctors say that there is nothing more they can do for AA and that his days with us are numbered from weeks to months. We now hope for a miracle from above. It is due to the reality of not having our son with us for much longer that Michelle was forced to take a personal leave from work and together with me, focus on helping our son enjoy what's left of his life with us. We would greatly appreciate any financial help you can provide us during this very difficult moment in our lives. Thank you.  

Michelle & Roi        

Just Press The Donate Button On The Upper Right Corner!

Hanging In There

Hang In There AA!

AA is hanging in there today. The doctors still can't believe that he is hanging in there like he is. Yesterday was a pretty stable day for him while he was not as responsive as normal. Even though after his bath, while he was on his mom's lap waiting for the bed to be changed he said "Ah Ah Ah" which in Andrew's language means that he wants to go to bed. We were so happy to hear that, being that he did not say something for about a day. In fact, he is not supposed to being saying much at all from here on. We only hope that his fighting spirit is a good sign and that it's a sign of a miracle. Last night we had some more friends and family come over and even had a prayer group come over for a couple of minutes to pray for us. That was appreciated very much. Late in the evening AA seemed to be "puffy", his under eyes were swollen slightly as were his hands and feet which were also swollen. He now needs an oxygen mask on most of the time because he is now having trouble breathing fully on his own. Will keep you updated as usual. Until next time...
Roi

AA In The New York Post Today...

NY Post Posting on AA; 03/08/12, Page. 20

Hi Everyone,
I just wanted to post a small posting that appeared  in today's NY Post about AA's battle with Cancer. I wanted to thank Lance & Matt from NYC Dad's Support Group for the connection to fellow support group member Eddie Drossman. Eddie surprised us with this wonderful posting on AA and used his media connections to help us out. It's amazing how this support group has been a very therapeutic outlet for me during this tough time. I really appreciate it and our family appreciates it. Lance, Matt & Eddie, thank you! We also wanted to thank the NY Post for being awesome and helping us out as well.
Have a great day!
Roi

AA Song of Love is Back Online

AA's Song of Love Is Back Online

Just wanted you all know to know that AA's Song of Love is back online...Please check it out on the left hand side of the blog again....See a pic of it below, just in case...

Roi

Precious Moments

Life's most precious moments are sometimes born from the deepest depths of despair. Incomprehensible moments of human anguish and sorrow that sometimes produce precious memories. Precious moments that wear the badge of thousands if not miilions of seconds and experiences woven together to produce a delicately ornate life of dreams, expectations, emotions and realities. A set of life's wondrous gifts that few trully get the chance to have, let alone truly appreciate for it's true worth in spiritual and cosmic gold.
Luckily, we can count ourselves as owners of precious moments with AA especially after last night.
We are glad to say that AA had a better day yesterday and appeared to be in no pain or discomfort. He was more alert and opened up his eyes often and was reacting to alot of the stimuli we were giving him. We were once again blessed with the support of so many friends and family, including his Great Aunt Evelyn who flew in from Florida late last night to also spend time with him. Support that we could not have gotten through this with out. We were able to share alot of laughter and tears while reflecting on life with AA and in prayer as we were led in a very nice prayer session with Graciela, Michelle's "Aunt". It was very nice to have and to also have the baby reactive to it. We were also blessed enough to have a personal moment alone with AA. We were able to enjoy his beauty while telling him how much he means to us. Telling him of the immense sense of joy, love and pride that he has given to us as a gift for all to see. We were able to laugh, joke, cry and love our baby in solitude for a brief moment. A brief moment that we needed in order to start the process of healing which will take a very long time if ever to recover from. We were fortunate enough to see his precious eyes as he made so much eye contact with us and were even given one beautiful smile as well.
AA slept through the night comfortably unlike the last couple of nights even though his breathing is getting worse and it seems that his body is reaching the end of it's journey. Even though we are still faced with this reality, we still believe that God has not abandoned us and that there is still room for a miracle. In God we trust and we will give you more updates shortly. Until next time.
Roi

"Judging God" Posting on NYC Dads Group Support Group Website

Hello guys,

Just wanted to let you know that a previous posting I placed, "Judging God" was posted today on the support group I am a part of. Please visit the website and support the article and group by viewing the posting. Thank you!

http://www.nycdadsgroup.com/2012/03/judging-god.html

Roi LeGar

Try not to become a man of success but a man of value - Albert Einstein

A Rough Night

Hi everyone....last night was a very tough night. AA took a turn for the worse and was very bad last night. He had some very high blood pressures, heart rates, his breathing was very labored and he even needed to get a foley catheter placed in order to help him pass his urine since he is not able to do it on his own. We were very worried that last night was his last might but thankfully he is still here fighting. We still hope for a miracle. We would like to thank Dr.L and Kristi our RN for staying and helping us out yesterday. We also want to thank our family members/friends that stayed with us and also visited with us yesterday and today. We were able to get some foot print and hand print molds out of plaster done while he was sleeping. He did have moments of responding to us and opening his eyes at certain times. For those of us that slept, it was only for a couple of hours. We still hope that our Lord can make his miracle happen.

27 Months Ago...AA Was Born

AA, Mama & Dada On His Birthdate, 27 Months Ago..

AA On The Cover of The Inspiration Through Art Newsletter March 2012

27 Months of An Amazing Young Man And Still Fighting, Thank God!

Below is a brief description of some of the normal milestones that a 27-month old should be achieving at AA's Age...  
"Your preschooler is making important social progress. He's moved up from always playing alone, as he did when he was a baby. Now he's interested in other children. Even when the kids don't interact during their play, they're aware of one another. And it's as different from solo play as sitting in a crowded theater is from sitting home alone watching tv.

Playing with other children, even if it's parallel play, will become increasingly important this year. Kids often use this kind of play to join an activity already under way. Reserved kids may stay longer at this stage, and that's fine. You can boost your child's confidence by keeping playgroups small and familiar. Make a habit of inviting over just one or two children your child already knows. When your child is ready, you'll begin to notice more shared activity, fueled by improving language skills and a growing imagination."


What is amazing is these he was at the milestones last year before he got diagnosed. A whole year before he was supposed to be achieving them. As we look back on it now, we remember how far ahead he was in his development. Truly amazing. If he would have continued on that path he probably would be enrolled in college by now. 
The poem I posted last week of "The child's soul choosing it's mom" still resonates with me. It is amazing how most cultures believe that we have a living soul. A soul that existed before it manifested itself in our body and a soul that exists after we leave our bodies. This process of choosing the "right person/parents" to fulfill it's cosmic purpose is wonderful. I truly believe that God makes everything with a purpose and we hope that is the case here. We hope that AA did choose this path in order to full fill his cosmic & spiritual purpose, just like Jesus did. If he did, it makes me feel a bit better knowing that he knew what was to come during this journey, he knew that it was not going to be easy. There is no way that this type of disease or journey comes from God...I believe that now...I have always believed that there is A God and hope that he hears all of our prayers. Here is a verse from the bible that I have always liked, because of it's offer of Hope. At this point we will take all the Hope we can get... 
John 14:1-3

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." (NIV)

AA did not have a good night yesterday. He seems to be in more pain now. He spent all night in discomfort, moving his head around and putting his hands to his face and head as if he were in pain. The PCA pump he was placed on yesterday was eventually placed on continuous flow in order to help control his pain more along with some other meds to help. He now going to get a steroid to help him with some pain and swelling that he is probably experiencing. Michelle stayed up with him from 2-5am and cried each time AA threw her a "Help me mama" kiss. It was a rough night for them. We still believe that God can help AA get through this with life.  
We will keep you updated as things happen. Have a wonderful day!
Roi

Sunday Thoughts

Patient Controlled Analgesia (PCA) Pump

Sunday was an all right day today. Thankfully we have life and God has still given us another day to be with our beautiful boy. We had some more family come over and visit us and were happy they were able to see AA. As for our little warrior, he was in more pain today and needed the above PCA pump placed in order for us to administer pain medication as needed. We are glad that we decided to stay in the hospital because they were able to use this pump in controlling his pain as opposed to not having a pump at home and then having to run to the hospital to help us out. We continue to pray for a miracle and hope in God's ability to make one happen. He had some pudding and water to eat but was mostly sleeping besides that. We hope that everyone has a good evening.

"Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams." 
Ashley Smith
Roi & Michelle

Roots Run Deep

The Oak Tree

by Johnny Ray Ryder Jr.

A mighty wind blew night and day.

It stole the Oak Tree's leaves away.

Then snapped its boughs

and pulled its bark

until the Oak was tired and stark.

But still the Oak Tree held its ground

while other trees fell all around.

The weary wind gave up and spoke,

"How can you still be standing Oak?"

The Oak Tree said, I know that you

can break each branch of mine in two,

carry every leaf away,

shake my limbs and make me sway.

But I have roots stretched in the earth,

growing stronger since my birth.

You'll never touch them, for you see

they are the deepest part of me.

Until today, I wasn't sure

of just how much I could endure.

But now I've found with thanks to you,

I'm stronger than I ever knew.

A touching poem I recently came across when a friend gave us a card during these tough times. It means a lot to me given that it is symbolic of so much. It reminds me of the beauty of life and how there are things that have deeper meaning and purpose. Helps me remember the strength that we have acquired during this journey while testing the limits of our faith over and over again.

Today was a day that saw many friends and family members come visit us in a show of support. It was great to see some old friends while meeting some new people as well. We greatly appreciated an old friend, Nataki and one of the Pastors from her church coming to pray for AA, ourselves and the whole family. It was very moving and we believe that God is always powerful and is in full control of the situation. AA was not startled by the praying but did open his eyes wide when he saw and heard the praying.  The most he had opened them in days. I guess he recognized the language of Heaven.  Thank God. We also enjoyed AA eating two pudding containers today while mama tried giving him some bread. He seemed more comfortable with the pudding. He also had a great deal of water another good sign. We also did some finger print paintings with AA's hands while he was sleeping. It was pretty cool and fun and will be posting some pictures up tomorrow of them. As usual we had the hospital staff look after us in an excellent manner. AA did stay a wake today for about 2-3 hours, similar to what he did yesterday as well. It was a hard emotional day for Michelle today. Hopefully she will feel better tomorrow. The only slightly negative thing that happened today was that AA threw up a good amount in the evening after everyone left. We had to wipe him down and bath him again. He seemed to feel better afterwards because his blood pressure went down to normal levels. About an hour before he threw up his blood pressure was really, really high. Well now Michelle & AA sleep as I wait for the clothes to finish washing and then put them in the dryer. We wish you all a very good night and hope that the Spirit of God will keep you safe and sound as your all sleep. God Bless us all. Thank you and until next time.

Roi